Jack Nicklaus & George W Bush

President Bush was recently introduced at a rally in Columbus, Ohio by Jack Nicklaus. Bush was also introduced at a rally by Arnold Palmer in Pennsylvania. It must be nice to know that when you need a cure for a slice you can call the greatest golfers of all time to help you out.



This tells me President Bush has figured out who really decide elections in this country: GOLFERS! At a rally in Greenwood Village, Colorado John Elway introduced President Bush. I don't know what Bush is looking to get from Elway, but I can assure him even John Elway won't be able to help the football teams from Texas this year.



You're on the green, use the putter. You may be the President, you can make us go to war, but when you're on a putting green even you need to use a putter. If you can't figure out which one the putter is, look for the club with a flat face.

How the US can win back the Ryder Cup

No Three Putts has figured out how the US team can win the Ryder Cup in two years. Both Europe and the US teams play the same golf course, but we have two sets of greens. Obviously, the US gets the green below.

Watch your balls!

I can assure you that those who do not golf at this course do not look for golf balls at this course. This is quite a severe penalty for a man. I wonder what they do to women who violate this?

19th Hole

This guy is sick. Funny in a twisted way, but very sick.



There's another hurricane heading towards Jupiter, FL and No Three Putts has decided to be silly today.

Tee Time Girl aka Quench Wench

SECRETS OF A TEE TIME GIRL: Golfers, Scandals and the Beverage Cart



Nicole Kallis has written a book that takes a look into the good, the bad, and the perverted of what really happens from the vantage point of the beverage cart girl.



The beverage cart girl always interests me. Hey, I'm a guy, I like checking out pretty women when I'm out on the golf course doing some male bonding with my buddies. And because it gets hot in Florida, I'm always thirsty.



You would almost think that if I told you a beverage cart girl, or in Nicole's case the self-proclaimed Quench Wench, had written an interesting book about golf that it was a joke. You're thinking I've talked to those chicks before, they're a couple of clubs short of a set. But believe you me Nicole Kallis is a smart beverage cart girl with a great sense of humor. And to top it off she has a nice rack. This book is the real deal, it's a must read for all golfers.



Along the way, the book points out good things to do with the Cart Girl as well as one big no, no. After reading this book you'll have a whole new view on the job of the beverage cart girl and the importance of the cart girl to the golf experience. Nicole Kallis currently works at The Mt. Woodson Golf Club in San Diego as a Beverage Cart Girl.



To my readers, No Three Putts wants you to check out Nicole's website: TeeTimeGirl.com Then email Nicole and tell her you want a copy of her book.

Rick Reilly's Ryder Cup Rules

Sports Illustrated writer Rick Reilly had some interesting new Ryder Cup rules that are designed to make these matches fair again.



Rick Reilly's New Ryder Cup Rules



Here are two of my favorite Rick Reilly Ryder Cup rules:



9. Speaking of Tiger Woods, he's not welcome on the American team anymore until he actually wants to play in these. He always seems to play these things with all the enthusiasm of a man forced to take a bath with his mother-in-law. And since he's the big dog, everybody follows his lead. Great player. Lousy team player.



10. Just as England and Ireland were allowed to add Continental Europe in 1981 to restore the balances of these Ryder Cup matches, America will also be allowed to add a region. We take Fiji.



In addition to Fiji, I think we should also take the South African region, just to be on the safe side. Rick Reilly, No Three Putts agrees with you almost 100%. I do differ with you on number 7 though.



7. No more wives. No reason, really, except we're just sick of seeing them in matching outfits that make all of them look like Miss Dowdy, 1956. In what other sport, do the wives get to come in the team room for strategy sessions? It's emasculating and awkward.



True, the matching outfits are a bit silly, and the women going to strategy sessions makes no sense, but seeing Sonya Toms, Elin Nordegren and Amy Mickelson definitely adds to my viewing pleasure.

Bart Bryant wins, really he did

Who the hell is Bart Bryant? He's the guy that won the Texas Open last weekend. After going 0-for-186 on the PGA Tour Bart "the BartMan" Bryant, 41, has finally won a tournament. While the world watched the Ryder Cup this weekend, Bart Bryant quietly won the Texas Open. With rounds of 67-67-60-67 he easily won by 3 strokes. A 60? Doh! Holy sweet rounds!



Bart's brother Brad Bryant is also a professional golfer. Brad Bryant won the '95 Disney World/Oldsmobile Classic. The other brother combos that have won tournaments are Dave & Mike Hill, Lionel & Jay Hebert and Curt & Tom Byrum.



Congrats to Bart Bryant on winning his first tournament as a pro. After going through Q-School five times, I'm sure Bart is going to love the 2 year exemption he just earned by winning in Texas y'all.